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Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured Heart Approach, by Howard Glasser Jennifer Easley
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Review
After applying these strategies for less than a month, my difficult teenage daughter is incredible. --Parent. Everything we tried in the past was making the situation worse. Now our intense child is intensely wonderful without medications. --Parent/Educator. This is absolutely the most worthwhile information I have ever learned. My hyperactive child is now my amazing child. --Parent/Therapist
I have read dozens of books, tried dozens of programs with no change in my child's behavior what so ever. This book has changed our lives! We started implementing the steps and the very first day we saw a change in our child. Life has become pleasant and peaceful without any compromises. Our child is helpful, considerate and no longer talks back. He does his chores before we ask him and his room has stayed clean for three weeks without any nagging!!!! I highly recommend this book to anyone with a difficult child! --Parent/Educator
Like many of my peers, I too want to do the best possible job raising my children. The desire to be respectful and supportive does not always involve consistent discipline, but it should! Anyone with a sensitive, loving child can benefit from this book. Any parent who feels like they have tried every trick in the book to promote good behavior in their children, but can't seem to gain compliance in their kids, will benefit from this book. I was recommended this book by our psychologist, whom we have been seeing because I ran out of coping strategies for dealing with my very sensitive, very smart, and very compliant child who seemed addicted to PUSHING MY BUTTONS!! Turns out, the very emotional responses I had to my child's poor behaviors, was promoting the very things I was trying to;punish away; Time outs escalated into screaming matches and made me feel like a drill Sargent, not very productive, and definitely not respectful or supportive! Transforming the Difficult Child has opened my eyes to; accentuate the positive; and;down play the negative; In short, shifting all of my aggravated tirades into positive reinforcement of GOOD behaviors. Within two weeks of implementing this style of attention, my 5 year old was more relaxed, more cheerful, more agreeable and happier than I had ever seen him. In turn, he was also less anxious, stopped a nervous habit of lip licking that had been with him for two years, and lots of chapped skin! He now knows that he is good MOST of the time, and only bad once in a while. I was failing to acknowledge his good behavior, because that is what we think of as; expected; but He was feeling as if he was always bad, because our energy was always spent on correcting bad behaviors. Please read this book if you recognize any of the above story, or if you know someone who is in constant power struggles with their children. This book has a simple, gentle, loving and supportive plan of action that will change your Family for the better, even if your child isn't difficult. After all, we all want someone to acknowledge our good behaviors, who better to do it than your parent!! --ParentI have read dozens of books, tried dozens of programs with no change in my child's behavior what so ever. This book has changed our lives! We started implementing the steps and the very first day we saw a change in our child. Life has become pleasant and peaceful without any compromises. Our child is helpful, considerate and no longer talks back. He does his chores before we ask him and his room has stayed clean for three weeks without any nagging!!!! I highly recommend this book to anyone with a difficult child! --Parent/EducatorLike many of my peers, I too want to do the best possible job raising my children. The desire to be respectful and supportive does not always involve consistent discipline, but it should! Anyone with a sensitive, loving child can benefit from this book. Any parent who feels like they have tried every trick in the book to promote good behavior in their children, but can't seem to gain compliance in their kids, will benefit from this book. I was recommended this book by our psychologist, whom we have been seeing because I ran out of coping strategies for dealing with my very sensitive, very smart, and very compliant child who seemed addicted to PUSHING MY BUTTONS!! Turns out, the very emotional responses I had to my child's poor behaviors, was promoting the very things I was trying to;punish away; Time outs escalated into screaming matches and made me feel like a drill Sargent, not very productive, and definitely not respectful or supportive! Transforming the Difficult Child has opened my eyes to; accentuate the positive; and;down play the negative; In short, shifting all of my aggravated tirades into positive reinforcement of GOOD behaviors. Within two weeks of implementing this style of attention, my 5 year old was more relaxed, more cheerful, more agreeable and happier than I had ever seen him. In turn, he was also less anxious, stopped a nervous habit of lip licking that had been with him for two years, and lots of chapped skin! He now knows that he is good MOST of the time, and only bad once in a while. I was failing to acknowledge his good behavior, because that is what we think of as; expected; but He was feeling as if he was always bad, because our energy was always spent on correcting bad behaviors. Please read this book if you recognize any of the above story, or if you know someone who is in constant power struggles with their children. This book has a simple, gentle, loving and supportive plan of action that will change your Family for the better, even if your child isn't difficult. After all, we all want someone to acknowledge our good behaviors, who better to do it than your parent!! --Parent
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From the Publisher
Comments from Readers "We had lost hope. This approach has saved our family. We were spinning our wheels. Everything we tried in the past was making the problems worse. Now our intense child is intensely wonderful...without medications." "My child was diagnosed with ADHD. I thought it was a death sentence. We couldn't go an hour without an argument or some horrendous incident. Now I know peace and pleasure for the first time in many years." "This is absolutely the most worthwhile information I have ever learned. My hyperactive child is now my amazing child." "Our child was in therapy for years. The more she got in touch with her feelings, the more she seemed to take her anger out on us. It's hard to believe, but after applying these strategies for less than a month, my difficult daughter is now a cooperative and pleasant young person."
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Product details
Paperback: 272 pages
Publisher: Nurtured Heart Publications (April 1999)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0967050707
ISBN-13: 978-0967050706
Product Dimensions:
6 x 0.8 x 9 inches
Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.6 out of 5 stars
202 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#8,050 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
After the first chapter I began implementing some of the ideas with my six year old. The impact was swift and clear. He went from saying what a horrible bad kid he was, and how awful his summer was, to saying that he is doing well and what a great summer he has had! I have finished the book but haven't yet implemented everything. We will continue to work on it, but I really feel like I've finally found a possible solution for the extreme negative self esteem he's been struggling with!
This book has some very helpful approaches for dealing with your "difficult child", but it's needlessly wordy. I feel like it could have conveyed the same information in 40-50 pages of plain language and saved busy parents from wading through quite so many academic discussions.
The information in this book has made a big difference in our household. Our "Difficult Child" just turned 13 years old and I was concerned that the techniques might be too young for her. They are not. A child of almost any age would benefit from the approach of improving their self-esteem and of having parents who have learned to keep their cool. Great ideas and great book overall.
This book really helps parents make a mental shift in the way they parent. From no longer focusing on the negative and instead promoting positive behavior in even the most difficult behaving children with ODD/ADHD/ADD diagnoses. I use this book to help teach parents a different approach instead of expecting me to “fix†their child in therapy. Working with the child and the parent makes for a much more peaceful partnership at home!
I am now on chapter 9 of this book. The methods seem effective. However it's hard to read. I feel most of these 15 page chapters could have been summed up in 3 paragraphs or less. So to me I had to force myself to read the same thing over and over again an entire chapter
I can't say enough good things about this book. It has really made both me and my husband adjust the way we approach parenting our super intelligent, high energy boy. Thank you so much to the caring authors for creating this family dynamic altering book.
The advice in this book helped me to better understand my son. I have read 5 other books and tried implementing their plan....which didnt work for my son. I am so grateful for this book, such a different way of thinking and turning the downward spiral around! Wonderful! I am grateful!
This is the only parenting book, of dozens read, that helped with my kids at all. It helped when they were little and it still helps in middle school. The concepts are simple and the results are good. With two very challenging boys, it’s a constant struggle to stay positive and calm. I have one who is a born manipulator and one with organic brain damage. They both respond well to this approach and over time have become, dare I say, compliant?!?!?!
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